Radiation - daily tanning sessions from March 6 to April 21st
( had to repost to delete a spam comment)
The radiation suite is covered with murals of lake views, they are trying to make the place look cute since what happens in there is almost illegal and fatal !! nuking people. Well I look at it as scrubbing with Cholorox.
My radiation oncologist (Dr. S) appointment was on the 4th of March. I started the conversation by saying:
'You did a hell of a job convincing me to do rads despite my oncologists opinion that I might not need to'
He was slightly taken back, but then chuckled and shared some interesting information.
Apparently although I was under the impression that he was trying to blow my Plastic Surgeon Dr. P off about taking my case to the hospitals tumor board he actually did so without giving my name. There were several oncologists and surgeons on the board and given the information about my case all aggreed that radiation was the way to go for me, and that if I was going to get radiation there was no point in overkill by removing the remaining axillary nodes. There is something about this radiation oncologist that I like, and I really trust him in his field.
Secondly another study( which I must have missed somehow ) was published after we last talked which proved the benefit of radiation for people in my condition.
So these facts further sealed the deal about being right about choosing this path.
Dr. S was not against supplements when I asked whether I could take Curcumin which according to some research and actually a trial that was started ( but never completed due to financial reasons.. of course turmeric plants do not have $$$ in banks to sponsor this research !! ) by MD Anderson helps protect skin during radiation and could even enhance the efficacy of the radiation. Interestingly curcumin is also said to be good while taken with Adriomycin, but counteracts with Taxol. These things about supplements are really getting confusing, I am almost getting to the point where my oncologist is where I will not mess with them at all. Dr. S's message wa that he believes that radiation is so powerful that it will zap through anything no matter what I do.. hmm that is good and bad to hear, anyways. Shared my skin protection plan with him which was 2 gr curcumin daily, Pure Aloe gel ( with no alcohol) immediately after each treatment, and Aquaphor at night.
I will be seeing the Radiation Oncologist Dr. S every Monday throughout my treatment they have not done any bloodwork I guess they get it from my Oncologists lab.
In my mapping session(where they take multiple films and determine the position I will be on during every session) I went into treatment room 1 and was taken care by extremely nice radiation technicians and another person who I am suspecting is a supervisor or another rad doctor who was responsible for the mapping of the zap site.
I laid down on a narrow table ( I cannot believe how narrow these scanning, treatment tables are, what happens when a really large person comes it could be hard for them to balance on it I am no twiggie but I am sure there are more impressive butts out there than mine!) there is a round contraption as big as a car/truck tire that is attached to the base that rotates around me. There is a glass window from which the rays are directed for scanning or zapping. In the glass window of that contraption there are multiple leads(which reminded me of hundres of allen wrenches) which open and close, limiting the field of radiation given (OK I am making this up but it certainly looks like the scenario) They make a funny clicking noise as they are aligning between scans/zaps.
They made me lay on an air pillow and raise my right arm above my head to a - as comfortable as one can be when laying beneath a radiation bombardment line - and the air pillow molded to my shape using some kind of vacumming technique, hi Aylin meet your pillow for the next 33 days wonder if they'll let me take it home as a souvenir although I am highly suspecting that I will be more tempted to throw it in a bonfire.
The round contraption zoomed whirred around me technicians going in and out of the sealed room ( there is a curtain that they pass out from but behind the curtain is a lead door - they probably have the curtain so one does not freak out or get claustrophobic of being sealed in a lead room ) they told me that they had a camera in the room and when they go out they see me and can hear me. There were red laser beams aligning the machine with the wall ( I was looking to the left where there was a cross like opening in the wall which matched with the laser that was coming from the machine). I was not allowed to move a muscle or twitch !! for about 50 minutes, I wish I had known this, then I would have worked up to keeping my arm up for that long, it only had been 3 weeks since my exchange surgery and my shoulder mobility was not quite there. They were taking scans marking my chest with sharpies ( my chest looked like an elementary student geometry notebook !) my shoulder started aching, and despite all efforts of trying to relax I started tensing up. they told me to breathe normally so they could do the mapping of the radiation to avoid my heart and lungs but it was really hard to keep a relaxed state while on the verge of having a hissy fit. I almost felt like I was having a panick attack (like I did in my Ironman Swim in Austria last July) hyperventilating, I was sooo close to jumping off that table. If I meet anyone that will be going through radiation my first suggestion would be for them to ask whether it is ok to get something before the session to relax them like Xanax.
It took a lot of willpower to stay in that position for that long my shoulder was aching I was freaking out.. but it was finally over ! And my first treatment was also done at the same time. Usually I hear that they first do the mapping one day, then they do a dry run, then they start treatment, well we got all 3 in 1 ! That must have been because I was freaking out that my radiation should start latest 8 weeks from last chemo which was on March 6th exactly.
The radiation therapists/tech's are really nice with sense of humors I guess you have to be extremely nice to your patients if you are going to see them every single workday for 33 days and nuke them! Almost like working together on a temporary job.
As stated the following sessions were a lot quicker, I would be in and out in about 10 minutes. They did take xrays everyday, I was worried about the increased radiation exposure but my rad oncologist said that all the exposure was accounted for and the total mattered. He said I was getting about 61 greys ?? ( do not know what that means)
I started getting to know the radiation therapists and some patients that come at the same time as I did, everybody is so nice. This place is a lot different than the chemo ward, patients are not as sick, and they are at almost the end of their treatments which is making a huge impact on their morales. The only thing I do not like is being exposed to cookies that are in the waiting room everyday, even if I sit at the other end of the waiting room the vapors of those chocolate chips and vanilla travel across the room directly to my nose. Do not know how much more I can resist without taking a handful. Eating dessert should be fun, and doing something in moderation is NOT fun.. so if I want to have fun with cookies I have to have a lot of them. Warped thinking I know but thats how my brain seems to operate, so I do not take any cookies.
The drive to the hospital is about 20 miles, so I have been taking long lunch breaks from work. It is actually a nice break during the day I like going out listening to good/loud music and driving TG and the traffic is not bad.
The first couple of days I felt a lot of fatigue then figured it was really psychological. About 2 hours after each session I have a feeling similar to that of a 'coming cold/flu' and if I hydrate enough and eat a lot of fruits veggies, basically 'be a good girl' the fatigue goes away in a couple of hours.
My skin is holding up well as of end of the 12th session ( have 21 more to go), and I do not seem to have any nausea either.
In my 3rd day of rads I do not know where that idea came from but I decided that I would try fasting, giving the body a break and a chance to recover on a weekly basis. What a totally stupid thought, I can not believe that I even considered doing it during radiation treatment, I guess all the chemicals got to my brain and are impacting my judgment too. I crashed so badly that day took 2 days to recover from it.
But once the rads are over and my body is recovered from the wars I will do some kind of fasting on a periodic basis cause it certainly makes sense. 2
